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#WorkEvent

I usually dress up when we have an event or have a client meeting. This time we had a Grand Opening event in Santa Barbara so I got dressed for the occassion.

I love Elizabeth and James dresses for my professional life. It’s simple, girly and easy. Plus they have a lot of great styles and colors.

Sometimes I can find a great deal through eBay, Amazon, NM Last Call and Nordstrom.

Work Work Work

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life” Confucius

The funny thing is, I’ve heard the quote many times in my life and I never thought anything of it.

I didn’t know I’d end up where I am today but each day is such a pleasure and I don’t feel like I’m working for a paycheck. This job chose me and I would have never imagined myself in this line of career but I can’t imagine doing and or being anything else.

Life is just too simply weird and sometimes, we just have to go with it.
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Crying for help, but not really.

Since my life didn’t provide me a sibling and I’m not one to expect sympathy, I’m not sure what to do in moments like these.

I have a lot of friends but why is it that I don’t feel comfortable calling up the ones that are constant in my life. Are they just party friends? Do I not respect their opinion? Do we even have anything in common? The answers to those questions aren’t what they shouldn’t be.

Since I got back from PS, I’ve been feeling different. Jo made a joke saying how she wanted to be antisocial and I laughed. But here I am wanting the same. I don’t want to talk to anybody, I don’t want to see anybody and I feel very alone.

I have been bored with life and I’ve been distracting myself with social events, dinners, drinks, texts and television. That only lasts … until you break.

I don’t want to kill myself. I’m just feeling lost. I thought real hard about who I wanted to share my feelings with and I couldn’t figure it out. If I had a sibling (sister especially), that is who I would be calling, but I don’t. I have lots of friends that are like sisters to me, but it’s different. I went down the list of friends. “Nah, she doesn’t quite understand. Eh, she’s just going to tell me what I want to hear. Humph, she’s so busy.” I don’t even know why I was presuming their reactions when it hadn’t even happened, but I had a feeling that I wouldn’t get the compassion and comprehension that I needed….UNLESS the person was completely happy with themselves.

I guess, THAT was the point. My friends are happy in their lives, but I needed someone who was more than happy. Satisfaction, not content, ecstatic about their journey, life goals and their place in the world. Not someone who is just happy with the way things were and living day by day without any thought about the future or their belonging in society. I needed someone spiritual, a friend who was strong enough to carry my sadness, even just for an hour. Okay, maybe an hour was too long, only needed 30 minutes. I couldn’t think of anyone.

Or maybe it wasn’t even about that, maybe I was too embarrassed to share my thoughts and feelings and I was making excuses to not call up a friend. Maybe I wasn’t ready, I did need to gather my thoughts because I didn’t know what was causing my outbursts of tears (during work hours too, thank God my co-worker called out sick), the sudden pressure of misery. It’s like the Grim Reaper took over my soul and until I found the light to revive me, I wouldn’t be able to shake this depression out.

It wasn’t this bad yesterday. I knew I didn’t want to talk to anyone, so I put my phone away when I got home from work. I came home mellow with a decision to think about from my project manager and I wasn’t stressed. I knew I wanted to pray about it and hope that there would be a sign to guide me in the position I would decide to move forward with. My decision to pray about it solely came from past dilemmas which I’ve prayed about and things somehow magically worked out. I can’t remember at this moment what they were but I remember praying. I was given until next week to decide. My heart is heavy, not because the opportunity given to me by my company but because I’m not well, spiritually, to make a decision. And I want to make the right decision.

What makes me most miserable are the things that seem easy to control but somehow, I have a hard time and I keep spiraling out of space.

In all honestly, in this moment, as I write my next few sentences, I feel a little bit better. It reminds me of the time that I used to blog and vent about the things I feel to make myself feel better. I didn’t have anyone then and that’s why I started the Xanga and blogging. I haven’t written in my blog in a while, in a naked way. I tend not to when in a relationship because my partner (at the time and currently) will always read it and ask about the post. I wish they didn’t, and wouldn’t. It really fucks with my desire to release my expressive thoughts. Maybe I need to change or create a new blog where I can share my thoughts with anonymity.

I’m just glad I’m not still complaining about how shitty I feel.

I feel better. Will I feel better tomorrow? I don’t know. Do I want to talk to someone? No I don’t. Do I want to see anyone? No I do not. Not even my husband. So what am I suppose to do? I don’t know. But I do have to get home now….

How do other only children handle situations like these?

P.S. I scheduled the post, went away and started to feel shitty again. I almost feel like the saying “fake it till you make it”.

Work to Play – Best way to live #DW #OOTD #OOTN

Being a professional, I enjoy looking as #Glamoulous (Glamorous and Fabulous).

This concoction of items is exactly what I would wear if it were readily available in my closet in the morning when I wake up on a groggy Monday Tuesday morning. (I keep forgetting, my weekends are Sundays and Mondays, Tuesday becoming my Monday.) Everyone feels like shit on that first weekday back to the office, no matter how glamoulous your job is.

The trick for me is to ALWAYS dress like a million bucks. Nothing brightens up your day more than feeling confident in the way you look or even getting a few compliments from others. If you can notice a difference in yourself, for sure, the rest of the world can too.

I chose this amazing Sultry Mesh Panel Bodycon Dress because it seems to be the one that can go from day to night. I always like to enjoy a Happy Hour sesh with my girls after work and if I can look just as amazing from work to play, I’m on board!

I’ve been obsessed with clutches lately and I do have a fur clutch that I love, but this Rosette Clutch is almost like the fur (I love textures) but way more feminine. It also matches the nude heels I picked out.

Nude is my all time favorite color for almost everything. The Schutz Carmen Fringe Heel is sassy and classy. The nude helps it be a bit muted for work and perfect for play with the fringe. That is why nude is universal. No matter how trendy the item, it’s always muted! 🙂

Leather Jackets are a must in LA, it’s never too cold or never too hot in the evenings, so you grab and go with the easiest. I can’t live without a piece of leather and fur. My two favorite materials.

Accessories are meant to be stacked and worn heavily. Find the pieces that are suitable to you. I like one arm to be heavy and the other to be dainty, so play around and see what you like as your arm candy.

If you’re looking for that perfect #LBD (Little Black Dress), make sure you check out these amazing styles in DailyLook’s collection!

Beautysets - Work to Play

#DW @ElizandJames

Dressing well definitely helps me with feeling confident. 

My first day working alone on the site and I was super anxious. I couldn’t sleep all night and I knew I had four set appointments to give it my best. I wanted to look great, professional, and GOOD. 

I bought this dress in Kansas over the holidays and I knew I was saving this dress for an occasion. Friday was the day. 

I’m glad I wore this dress because I feel invincible and gorgeous! 

I remember from a meeting… You have to dress the part to feel confindent about yourself. I felt very confident. 

I was on my feet all day, now I just have to figure out how to not make my feet hurt while in stilettos ALL DAY. 

This is my favorite article of clothing in my closet. I’m a size 2, and it fits perfectly! 

Elizabeth and James Women’s Bardot Mini Dress









New Job, New Clothes!!

Came to the H&M at 7th & Fig because I didn’t want to spend so much. I just needed a few outfits to help me get my week started.

I know she said business professional but that’s not the impression I got when I visited. I think she only wanted to emphasize “NO CLEAVAGE”. I remember she made a comment once and I was not trying to show my boobs. I’m sorry my boobs are so big that it’s in your face even when I try to dress conservative.

I even went to Zara after, no luck. Either it was way overpriced or not cute enough.

Although I found a pair of pump that I loved but were too big to purchase. Luckily, they were on sale online and they had my size! 🙂

#SCORE!

I only ended up walking out with three items. I guess you’ll have to see when I wear it out!

BTW, I hate business professional. Well, cheap business professional, that is. I wouldn’t mind Dolce & Gabbana suits all day and every day!

 

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